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CamouflagedKiwi 5 hours ago [-]
This is kinda fun, but doesn't match most of my experience splitting firewood.
The wood barely moves after it's split. If you split it perfectly, the two halves will almost certainly both fall to each side (they're pushed outwards by the axe).
You can't just randomly split it across the grain into slices like you're slicing bread.
I guess mostly: it's not tiring, which sort of sucks when you're doing it for real, but it is satisfying. This doesn't scratch that itch for me, but I guess it's fun in a way, similar to that cleaning simulator thing.
neilv 3 hours ago [-]
For players who are new to the game, there should be a 1/4 chance you go to bed proud of an honest day's work with your hands, and wake up the next morning having strained a muscle you didn't even know you had, and you can't chop wood for the next couple weeks.
helterskelter 3 hours ago [-]
There's a surprising amount of technique and knowledge that goes into splitting firewood. It isn't rocket science, but I know a 75 year old who can chop wood faster than any young guy who works out at the gym.
cpncrunch 38 minutes ago [-]
It's a combination of technique and the type of wood. Even with perfect technique, some wood is simply too hard to split. I've got the bottom 5 or 6 rounds of a bigleaf maple sitting in my yard that I simply can't make a dent in. You're welcome to take it if you can split it :)
Theodores 1 hours ago [-]
In former times you had to serve a twelve year apprenticeship before you could be trusted to split wood for barrels, you can do a PhD in rocket science in less time.
scottcorgan 5 hours ago [-]
this is the most hacker news comment possible
warumdarum 4 hours ago [-]
I miss the part where the axe gets stuck and you hsve tovturn it over. I found it well made and deeply satisfying
helterskelter 3 hours ago [-]
> I miss the part where the axe gets stuck and you hsve tovturn it over.
Hit it around the edges, like taking a chord from the edge of a circle, and try to use the top half of the bit to do cutting. Good ax technique depends on accuracy, on top of which you can slowly add strength as your accuracy improves. If there's a crack in the end of a round, you should be able to put the bit of the ax directly into it, which will normally split it wide open without much effort. Different species of wood have different characteristics though, so terms and conditions apply.
telesilla 1 hours ago [-]
As someone who spent a teenagehood doing the same, I agree it was far too (un)satisfying to be able to cut the pieces and not having them fall to the side. But if you have an excellent axe and true flat surface you could get pretty close to the game. But for better reality it needs more indication of splinters and blisters after a few runs. I suggest adding a cast iron wedge splitter as a next level option.
JodieBenitez 4 hours ago [-]
> If you split it perfectly, the two halves will almost certainly both fall to each side
Just put it in a old small tire :)
Reason077 3 hours ago [-]
Was just doing this literally the other day! But with a hydraulic log splitter which made it pretty easy and fun. The hardest part was lifting and stacking all the logs!
jonstewart 35 minutes ago [-]
There should be a "hickory" option where the axe just bounces back at you or gets stuck in the round.
For anyone reading the above comment and wanting to see what the commenter might be referring to, here is the first YT video I found on that channel that is relatively brief but has an example of the techniques involved:
> This is kinda fun, but doesn't match most of my experience splitting firewood.
Neither mine, I have a machine that does it for me. Much safer and efficient.
kmoser 3 hours ago [-]
I find it much easier to use AI to vibesplit my firewood. Sure, it costs me lots of money to buy axe tokens, and sometimes all I end up with is a useless pile of splinters or sawdust, but it's the way of the future; just imagine how efficient it'll be when the tech has matured?
thenewwazoo 2 hours ago [-]
You're right, and I'm sorry. You specifically instructed me to split the logs in the side yard, and I split the cat. I recognize now that this was a strategic error, and cutting the cat into chunks does not accomplish the goals.
edit
AGENTS.md
+ Only chop things made of wood. Meat does not split well. NEVER cut up the cat.
I've updated the AGENTS.md file to track this mistake in the future. Should I continue chopping the rest of the firewood?
Chaosvex 2 hours ago [-]
The new model is so good at splitting firewood that it's too dangerous to release to the public without safeguards to stop it from splitting things that aren't actually firewood. The old models are terrible - I can't believe we ever thought they were good.
Remember: this is the worst that splitting firewood will ever be.
notrealyme123 2 hours ago [-]
It might split atom's
apercu 4 hours ago [-]
I only like splitting perfectly seasoned wood ( I do about a face cord every summer/fall). Otherwise it’s just too much work. Got any tips in to tooling? I use a maul.
rebuilder 3 hours ago [-]
In my experience, fresh wood splits much easier. I prefer a big splitting axe. But mostly the wood I use isn’t terribly gnarled or wide.
People here seem a little confused. This is a simulator in the same way Goat Simulator is a simulator. It’s from a collection called “screen toys” and it’s meant to be mindless fun.
binoct 7 hours ago [-]
Here here. This was a joy to wake up to and wish I hadn’t stumbled into the comments.
sowbug 1 hours ago [-]
Then you're really going to love this.
The proper term is a shortened form of "hear him, hear him," which was necessary because British Parliament didn't allow clapping or cheering. Instead, if you wanted to show agreement with a speaker's point, you'd shout out that everyone else should "hear" him.
Not to be confused with "hear ye," which evolved from the French "oyez," which is the imperative form of "to listen," which was shouted at a crowd before an important announcement.
Timwi 1 hours ago [-]
For future reference, the phrase is “hear, hear”.
pranavm27 6 hours ago [-]
And this is HN, its acting as its meant to xD
aaron695 8 minutes ago [-]
[dead]
wartywhoa23 7 hours ago [-]
This is HN I'd like to see more of.
Mocking too nerdy gripes on "simulator" accuracy, sharing some real world experience with physical things beyond the screen frames, and on in the same vein.
A breath of fresh air, really, in the prevailing AI smog.
tylerrobinson 5 hours ago [-]
FWIW, the creator’s Insta post for this thing says #vibecoding
@shapiro500
No shade if so, I think it’s an awesome little toy.
underdeserver 5 hours ago [-]
I don't think I could have vibe coded that.
At the very least, he photographed and built models of logs and his own yard.
jenniferhooley 5 hours ago [-]
I do a lot of game stuff (professionally and just for fun) and play around with maxing out vibeing little feature samples.
This would be fairly straightforward vibecode over a day or two.
Definitely not to throw shade at the guy. But yea, there is nothing here that wouldn't be easily vibeable.
gaudystead 37 minutes ago [-]
Minimum Vibeable Product
lukan 6 hours ago [-]
"in the prevailing AI smog"
How do you know AI was not used in the making of this?
(personally I don't care, the result seems nice to me)
wartywhoa23 6 hours ago [-]
This I don't know, but at least the topic is not related!
jeron 6 hours ago [-]
only a small subset of the HN front page is AI related lol
encom 6 hours ago [-]
What bizarro world HN are you reading? I'd like the link, please.
wiml 4 hours ago [-]
Looking at the front page right now, only about 8 out of 30 are about AI.
troyvit 6 hours ago [-]
There was this old Piers Anthony short story about a little kid who likes playing with his dad's wood-splitting kit. He's a little kid so he doesn't handle an axe, but he does use adzes, hatchets, I dunno stuff I don't remember now[1]. Anyway he gets kidnapped by aliens and gets to join a great intergalactic wood-splitting competition. I won't ruin it but maybe if you get really good at this simulation you could be next.
Haha this is also the plot of The Last Starfighter but with video games. I wonder if the screenwriter was familiar with it.
jcims 5 hours ago [-]
Damn I loved that movie!
MatthiasWandel 8 hours ago [-]
Looks like its coded by someone who has never split firewood.
The challenge is not deciding where to split, its executing the split. Like hitting the same gap if it doesn't split, deciding orientation to aoid knots, figuring out how to put it on end if it wasn't cut straight.
And some of the cuts it allowed me would hit the ax handle on another part, the shock from that damages the ax handle and is painful on the hands.
And then there's the lifting the stuck block by the axe and hitting it axe side down to finish the split instead of pulling the stuck axe out.
So the simulation handles none of the challenges of splitting wood.
bsiverly 7 hours ago [-]
I swear this forum needs to embrace their inner child more some days. My four year old loved this.
Well executed fun.
derbOac 19 minutes ago [-]
I love it also, but I think the comments are pointing to an unmet need for firewood splitting simulators.
The comments are suggesting that someone could go to town adding different kinds of hatchets, mauls, axes, woods, and different swings, and people would eat it up.
micromacrofoot 25 minutes ago [-]
to be fair this wasn't being shared to a site filled with four year olds
stavros 18 minutes ago [-]
My inner four year old loved this.
goosejuice 4 hours ago [-]
Both can be true. It's cool and fun but simulation is a well defined term.
Jgrubb 7 hours ago [-]
Yes, but obviously this toy faces a challenge when folks who take this stuff seriously walk by. I immediately want a bungee to put around it so the wood doesn't go everywhere. I also want to split it finer than in quarters. Had to nope out.
furyofantares 6 hours ago [-]
I think it might be more that folks who take this stuff seriously face a challenge when someone makes a toy about it.
I believe the toy is indifferent to your inability to enjoy it.
bsiverly 6 hours ago [-]
Seems like you know what you want to go build. Can’t wait to see your version on HN soon :)
Jgrubb 3 hours ago [-]
I have too much actual wood to split but I like where you're head is at.
PufPufPuf 7 hours ago [-]
The "beer drinking simulator" we all had on our phones in 2010 wasn't a very accurate representation of drinking beer either
nik282000 7 hours ago [-]
I am shocked that tapping a touchscreen is nothing like splitting wood with an axe.
mikestew 7 hours ago [-]
Man, don’t ever play Goat Simulator, then. You’ll be all day typing a wall of text about that.
JKCalhoun 7 hours ago [-]
"So the simulation handles none of the challenges of splitting wood."
Ha ha, that's why we like it.
Daub 7 hours ago [-]
Experienced wood splitter here. All your points are valid. I had to ruin one perfectly good axe handle before I learned how to swing. However, the sim is still a lot of fun.
embedding-shape 6 hours ago [-]
> I had to ruin one perfectly good axe handle before I learned how to swing.
Is it really that difficult? Maybe my memory is vague, but chopping wood in autumn/fall for the winter just took a bunch of time, and wasn't very fun, but wasn't that bad, especially compared to other things like harvesting veggies stuff where you have to be on the ground. I'm not sure how you'd manage to ruin a axe handle before understanding how to do it well-enough, takes a couple of swings at max.
JackFr 4 hours ago [-]
I spent a summer chopping a whole bunch of wood with a steel handled 10 lb maul. Many was the evening where my hand was numb until the morning, but by the end of the summer my shoulders were ripped.
You quickly learn the differences between locust, pine, maple, oak or, god forbid, cherry.
Enginerrrd 4 hours ago [-]
Splitting Eucalyptus and big madrone by hand will test a man.
roarcher 5 hours ago [-]
Same. I've only done it a couple times but it takes minutes to learn and you just get into a rhythm and keep going. It's like peeling potatoes.
I wonder if there's a name for the psychological phenomenon of people doing some trivial blue-collar-ish task and then dramatizing it to make themselves sound like a grizzled old hand.
notduncansmith 5 hours ago [-]
Have heard this called blue-washing (eg Mike Rowe) when done publicly
MatthiasWandel 4 hours ago [-]
I once took a sledgehammer to work so everyone could take a turn taking a whack at some old prototypes outside. I came to the sad realization that even hitting a particular spot with a sledgehammer is not an inate skill. If you've never done it, you miss!
lbreakjai 42 minutes ago [-]
I've seen people miss the tractor wheel with a hammer at my gym. I didn't even know if was physically possible.
david422 3 hours ago [-]
Depends on the wood. Perfectly dry, seasoned hardwood is going to be easy. Wood with knots, soft wood etc. is going to take a while to figure out.
mikestew 5 hours ago [-]
Is it really that difficult?
It’s not, 12 year olds can do it. Ruining an axe handle is not a requirement. I’m not saying humans are born knowing how to swing an axe, but c’mon.
MatthiasWandel 4 hours ago [-]
A 12 year old can indeed acquire that skill, but that doesn't mean any adult can do it.
roarcher 4 hours ago [-]
Some adults indeed can't do it, but that doesn't mean it's difficult.
And it is certainly not "wear out a whole axe handle just to learn to swing" difficult.
mauvehaus 3 hours ago [-]
You don't wear it out. You land the head long of your aim point, and splinter the handle on whatever you were trying to hit. It's certainly not hard to ruin a handle if you're learning to swing a sledge by driving steel splitting wedges.
aqrit 5 hours ago [-]
>Is it really that difficult?
Fiberglass handles are now standard on splitting mauls (for this reason).
Rotten hearts, or driving wedges. It is easy to miss a swing by an inch or two when fatigued.
Edit: I also broke my first axe handle. The sibling comments here are wild.
lstodd 3 hours ago [-]
Yeah, tell me about fiberglass. It slips out too. And that was Fiskars, not some noname crap.
When it does, you put it back and hammer some big screws and nails into it, this way it holds some more time.
InsideOutSanta 2 hours ago [-]
I can't tell if this is a parody of HN comments or a serious response to a little toy app.
raincole 7 hours ago [-]
FYI Tree Simulator is coded by someone who has never been a tree too.
bot403 7 hours ago [-]
Oh you guys are all gonna hate Sim Ant.
the_af 2 hours ago [-]
I had a lot of fun with Sim Ant... but mostly playing as the spider :D
(I'm talking about the classic, not sure if there's a remake).
sgarrity 7 hours ago [-]
I might print out this quote and put it on my wall! :-)
"Looks like its coded by someone who has never split firewood. "
alamortsubite 5 hours ago [-]
It's perfect because the kind of people who will enjoy it shouldn't be allowed near an axe, anyway.
As someone with a wood stove, for my first few chops I rotated the log to orient the checking. Then it dawned on me that the simulation likely wasn't that sophisticated, and I came here to meet up with you guys.
andix 7 hours ago [-]
It's obviously not an accurate simulation. I'm sure the creator knows it isn't. Probably the best they could come up with in limited time.
idiotsecant 7 hours ago [-]
I don't know if you know this or not, but this is a game.
crtified 37 minutes ago [-]
This task has what I'd call asymmetrical reciprocity.
That is, it's probably easier for the development professional to code a pretend version of chopping wood, than it is for the professional axeman to chop out a pretend version of a computer.
However I do eagerly await being proven wrong.
sklargh 9 hours ago [-]
If this triggers your interest in IRL firewood splitting it’s a very meditative and satisfying yard job. Also great mild to moderate workout between the splitting and stacking, especially on a crisp Fall afternoon.
delichon 8 hours ago [-]
I have a lot of splitting to do right now, and you're welcome to it. I'll only charge a low nominal fee. But let me know before September, because that's when I usually go rent a hydraulic splitter from the local hardware store. Then I spend a very long day splitting so that I can return it the next day.
I've spent a lot of time splitting with a big maul, but for me it's harder that it looks. I've broken two mauls by striking to far. And even with "soft" wood, I have stacks of green rounds that I couldn't split at all, the maul just bounces off. But I'm glad that you enjoy the process, I'd probably enjoy watching you work.
bee_rider 8 hours ago [-]
If the hydraulic splitter could be electric, so it would not be so loud, I could see that task being meditative. Preferably if the rounds could on a raised platform, so they could just be rolled onto the thing.
Next request, the wood could stack itself somehow.
mauvehaus 3 hours ago [-]
Vertical splitters are better since the splitter comes down to ground level where your rounds already are. Much less lifting.
I'm not super quick with a maul, but I can pretty easily keep up with the hydraulic splitter I've used. The hydraulic splitter is nice for the ones that have really gnarly, interlocked grain.
bluGill 1 hours ago [-]
Until you get a log so tough, it just stalls up when you draw a splitter. Happened more than once. Usually the log is stuck so far in the wedge you can't get it off either.
adm4 8 hours ago [-]
as camping is to "glamping," splitting wood is to "sprinkle wood?"
1dontnkow_ 8 hours ago [-]
This reminded me when we I was a kid we had to split the wood for the whole winter and that was actually a huge job all day or few days and way harder than just a moderate workout.
I hated it then but actually now I miss the time I spend with my father and brother.
Loughla 6 hours ago [-]
I hated cutting wood, stacking wood, splitting wood, all of it. We ran a potbelly stove in the living room when I was a kid for heat. I hated the stove too.
The only thing I don't miss is rolling a piece of piss elm over to my city living "tough" cousins after two or three pieces of oak and watching the maul just bounce off. Always funny.
crimsonnoodle58 8 hours ago [-]
Good workout and satisfying, I totally agree. I actually really enjoy it.
But the long term effects on your joints, even if you think you have perfect technique, its better to just get a wood splitter. We can do a whole winters wood in less than a day now, with minimal effort.
MatthiasWandel 4 hours ago [-]
Gotta agree with you there, log splitters rule. We got a little 4 ton electric one for my mom, and on some pieces it would stall. I thought, what a wimpy thing, but then hitting those pieces it wouldn't split with an axe, I realized, those were really hard to split pieces.
Just growing up in the 80s we didn't have one cause my dad didn't believe in them.
PyWoody 8 hours ago [-]
If you're chopping wood in the Fall, I sure hope it's for next year's winter.
codemonkey-zeta 8 hours ago [-]
Nope, splitting green wood is much more difficult than splitting dried logs, so I often cut a tree in the spring, stack the rounds, then split those rounds in the fall.
People overestimate how dry wood needs to be to burn correctly. Just have some ultra-dry kindling (seasoned for 2+ years) and you won't have any problems.
On the contrary, I know some folks who let all their wood dry too far, and it burned way too hot and ruined their stove (and almost burned their house down).
PyWoody 7 hours ago [-]
Yikes. I hope you got your chimney swept annually.
Seasoned firewood will burn cleaner, longer, and more efficiently.
cluckindan 7 hours ago [-]
It’s an equation. If you have dry firewood, you need less of it at once. Some folks don’t understand that.
More water in the wood means less efficient combustion, more smoke and harsher smoke, which may irritate your neighbors downwind, or everyone around on still days.
dylan604 6 hours ago [-]
Something every pit master learns along the way. People can tell you, you can read about it, but until you actually try using wood of different dryness, they are just words.
2 hours ago [-]
6 hours ago [-]
nickstinemates 8 hours ago [-]
Taking a few minutes out of the day to to split some logs to hear your house for your family feels incredibly rewarding and satisfying.
Jgrubb 7 hours ago [-]
[dead]
astura 8 hours ago [-]
Don't listen to this noise; it fucking sucks, it's kinda dangerous, and it's not at all meditative. It's the exact opposite of meditative. My parents made me do it because they certainly didn't want to, because it sucks. I'm so glad I don't have to split firewood ever again.
If you're looking for a meditative exercise try yoga.
klibertp 8 hours ago [-]
Well, it's the kind of "meditative" you get when training martial arts forms. It gets good after a few years of preparation; before that, it's not as fun as spars and way less useful than general conditioning.
Coming from a kendo background, when I had to chop firewood for a few years while living in the countryside, I generally focused on accuracy. The swing is completely different than with a sword, and getting the chop to land at the exact spot (I drew lines with a marker) tens of times in a row was very satisfying, but required a lot of conscious effort to get there. It's not trivial to land a chop at the exact spot you want, and it's also quite hard to ensure the axe travels at its fastest exactly at the moment of impact.
It can be fun, but you need to be into things like that in the first place; plus, having to do it no matter the weather and all the other things you need to do can kill all the joy instantly.
bee_rider 8 hours ago [-]
It’s also astonishing how much wood needs to be split, to heat even a moderately sized house. Depends on the climate though, I guess.
dredmorbius 7 hours ago [-]
And the fireplace / stove.
Most open-hearth fireplaces are tremendously inefficient, not only sending most of the heat up the chimney, but drawing in additional cold air in doing so.
A masonry stove with an external air draw should be far more efficient, and burn much more cleanly to boot. The pollution factor from woodstoves is another major consideration, and means wood-burning is limited in many areas.
dylan604 6 hours ago [-]
My dad and his father built the house my family grew up in. The fireplace had two vents on either side of the fire box that drew air from the floor and vented near the ceiling. The ceiling fans in the room would circulate the air in the room. It was the only place I've spent time that a fireplace actually was useful.
bluGill 50 minutes ago [-]
When those work well they're fine but be very careful. It's not uncommon of for smoke to go out what you think is the in intake and often those aren't correctly built as a chimney and so you can burn your house down.
AaronAPU 7 hours ago [-]
You sound like my father when someone mentions green beans
sva_ 2 hours ago [-]
Here's a script to automatically chop wood, if you're so inclined:
The pieces look like they retain the shapes I cut them in when stacked. I started cutting them as pie slices, but then tried a few as parallel chops, and they get stacked in those shapes.
Also interesting is the shadows of leaves that stay consistent on the scene as the pile grows, but they don't appear on the splitting area itself.
Lots of engine noise too, I guess that's the ambience in this person's back yard! Probably true for lots of us.
Animats 60 minutes ago [-]
I kept at it until firewood filled 3/4 of the surrounding circle. After that, new firewood just seemed to disappear.
You can't win.
comrade1234 8 hours ago [-]
Half the battle is having the right stance so that you don't accidentally embed the axe in your shin.
oh_my_goodness 7 hours ago [-]
I'm ok that they left that part out.
nZac 9 hours ago [-]
This simulates a person far more skilled than me.
I never had to adjust the chunk to get it to sit right, the maul hit exactly where I told it to, and it even stacked itself!
bluGill 8 hours ago [-]
Never had the maul get stuck in the wood. Never had the wood fly off the splitting stump.
oh_my_goodness 7 hours ago [-]
It does fly off sometimes in the game.
bluGill 6 hours ago [-]
I didn't see that but I only did a couple before deciding this reminds me too much of work.
niraj-agarwal 3 hours ago [-]
Got the chop wood, now need the draw water and then we will be good
m12k 3 hours ago [-]
In case anyone is wondering, the quote "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water" is an ancient Zen Buddhist proverb. It speaks to how the life you live, and actions you perform, before and after enlightenment are not materially different. But how and why you do and experience them changes, becoming more mindful and less mired in “attachment” and overthinking.
cinntaile 8 hours ago [-]
It bothers me that I can split a log in 3 parallel pieces, rotate 90 degrees and then magically can split the middle piece. That's physically difficult!
Besides that it was fun.
Choco31415 3 hours ago [-]
I chopped so much wood that the browser was starting to lag. Thanks for sharing the simulator, it was fun!
mac3n 7 hours ago [-]
Nothing beats coming home from work, chopping something into pieces, and setting it on fire.
foxmoss 3 hours ago [-]
This is cool, but I just got incredibly sidetracked by the fact that author Gavin Shapiro has a fake museum in the arctic (museumzoetrope.org). Half as a ploy it seems to raise the value of his penguin NFTs, half as quite a little prank on the internet.
rvnx 2 hours ago [-]
The page was developed by Claude, maybe you can share the prompt(s) so we can develop variants of it ? I was surprised to see it handles 3D like that so well
anon1094 5 hours ago [-]
It's all very satisfying: the animations, the chopping, the graphics, and the sounds. I spent more time than I should have chopping splitting firewood.
CWuestefeld 3 hours ago [-]
If you like this, then try playing Red Dead Redemption 2. While just a tiny part of the game, you improve your relationship with the rest of the gang by doing chores like splitting wood, and also carrying hay to feed the horses.
mauvehaus 3 hours ago [-]
Red Dead Redemption 2? The birding simulator also has firewood splitting and horse feeding simulators?
What about when you’re splitting a log with a branch and the maul bounces straight back up? Lol
ab_goat 9 hours ago [-]
Beautiful sim. Looks like red oak. As someone who has split a lot of wood, wish it could incorporate more of the struggles of splitting logs.
- missing your spot by 6” or more and creating a tiny shard that goes flying
- the log you’re aiming at falling as you are in your backswing
- getting your maul stuck halfway down the split
andwur 8 hours ago [-]
Could do with a difficulty setting that includes when you inherit someone else's log pile, someone who really enjoyed making every cut on a new and more inventive angle than the last.
Normally a wedge is used to split the wood, but it also doubles as a wedge to be wedged underneath just so you can get the log to stand up.
Also, Y sections (ycombinator mode?). 40 hits later and you might have a nice pile of woodchips, very rarely will it actually split in any clean way.
neogodless 9 hours ago [-]
Yeah this needs pieces with knots, and having to swing at least 3 times before the initial split works. Very unrealistic, 3/10. Need some wedge + sledgehammer modes.
Also how do I simulate my shoulder and lower back hurting?
bee_rider 7 hours ago [-]
With your additions, it probably could be a really neat mini game to have in a survival-crafting game... Game, so, it doesn’t have to be perfect.
But the axe could wobble a bit, depending on some combination of chopping skill and how tired your guy is (simulating shoulder pain and lower back pain). Number of hits required depends on character strength and how straight on the hits are.
I’m not sure how the game would track the pieces of various sizes, though. I guess this would just be for firewood (building wood might have to be handled separately) so maybe it would be fine to just calculate the volume of each slice and have it provide fuel based on that…
bot403 6 hours ago [-]
I think if you sit and play it for 10 hours your lower back will hurt too. It just takes longer.
jojobas 8 hours ago [-]
You'll like Spintires.
KronisLV 8 hours ago [-]
And MudRunner and SnowRunner as well! Great games (in a sometimes frustrating way).
adamddev1 5 hours ago [-]
Delightful little experience. Very nice. What would be even cooler would be if the axe only went partway down sometimes and then you have to lift the log up with the axe inside a couple of times to finish it off with that satisfying full split.
wxw 3 hours ago [-]
Wonderful. I appreciate that it auto-rotates when the piece is too narrow to split along one axis.
This is fun and looks amazing, however there seems to be quite a bit of texture in the out of focus blur. There's also a lot of aliasing on the grass. Also, I think the camera shake could do with a very slight delay after the axe hits, and maybe a slightly slower decay curve.
coolfox 2 hours ago [-]
I was able to get 19 slices out of one log
9 hours ago [-]
kwdev 6 hours ago [-]
Can I have a "Carry Water Simulator" to go with it?
thomasfl 2 hours ago [-]
Gaussian splat based game will probably become popular. This game is not gaussian splat rendered 3d, but it is pretty close. Next step is gaussian splat and animations.
alliao 2 hours ago [-]
if you click fast enough you summon additional axes from the ether
blackdogie 9 hours ago [-]
That was a fun work out. I was wondering what happened when you "filled" the circle of firewood.
ralfd 9 hours ago [-]
What happens?
kevmo314 9 hours ago [-]
It starts stacking a second circle
oytis 8 hours ago [-]
Does it ever end though?
cluckindan 7 hours ago [-]
No, and that’s what makes it a proper simulator.
tonymet 55 minutes ago [-]
Add beers and drunkenness , and a scene where you miss the log and bury the maul into your leg.
ryanisnan 5 hours ago [-]
I like how it stacks the firewood.
imagetic 3 hours ago [-]
I have never wasted so much time doing something so useless.
imagetic 3 hours ago [-]
It was a lot of fun!
Waterluvian 9 hours ago [-]
I need a fireplace or bonfire simulator that I can throw these into.
bot403 6 hours ago [-]
There's a ton of non-interactive fireplace simulators on Netflix and YouTube. Especially around Christmas.
david422 3 hours ago [-]
Didn't even get my maul stuck once.
basedbertram 6 hours ago [-]
Fun experience, but the forced rotation after a certain number of cuts diminishes it.
felooboolooomba 4 hours ago [-]
Bug: No error displayed if WebGL is disabled.
supertroop 6 hours ago [-]
Thankfully there are no knots and it is softwood. Oddly satisfying.
traceroute66 8 hours ago [-]
Fun but hugely unrealistic simulation, so many "bugs":
- Able to split log into unrealistically thin slices and they remain perfectly upright
- Split a log into two, rotate 90 degrees, and by some miracle you can split the half further away from you whilst the piece nearest to you doesn't get hit or move an inch
etc.
blueaquilae 8 hours ago [-]
You don't understand don't you?
cratermoon 2 hours ago [-]
Fruit ninja but for logs. Now I can finally play lumberjack like I’m Nicole Coenen.
adm4 7 hours ago [-]
great game and very satisfying.
davidee 7 hours ago [-]
Missing the splitting axe getting a little jammed at a knot.
Otherwise excellent.
the_af 2 hours ago [-]
Small nitpick (not of the neckbeard type): if you split the wood in slices then rotate it so the cut strikes perpendicular to the slices, it tends to split horizontal pieces of wood without touching the rest, even if it's "sandwiched" between the other slices, which seems odd since it makes the axe edge feel like a surgical strike rather than something with length.
I think it would feel better if it modeled the length of the edge, which should disturb the other horizontal slices.
hagbard_c 8 hours ago [-]
Nice sim, there's one thing missing though: splitting two sections at the same time. It do this all the time as it can almost double splitting speed when dealing with mid-size logs. Split the log in two halves, making sure to keep the halves close together. Rotate around the splitting block by about 60°, split again hitting both halves at the same time. Do this once more and you've split the log into 6 60° sections, a good size for stacking in the fireplace and also a good section size to be able to light a fire. I split between 5 m³ and 7 m³ of firewood per year which is enough to heat our house and cook our food, have been doing this for about 20 years now so I have some experience. The double-split is a good time saver.
wartywhoa23 6 hours ago [-]
I'd upvote you twice for your nickname alone, if I could! All hail Eris! :)
MBCook 8 hours ago [-]
This works amazingly well on my iPhone with obvious touch controls.
Very impressive.
horticulturist 9 hours ago [-]
Oddly fun, though could use a little more variety, maybe with knots, etc.
alansaber 9 hours ago [-]
The momentum on the camera spin is very annoying. Really cool though
tharkun__ 9 hours ago [-]
That and the fact that you can rotate w/ left click as well. Turns out I naturally drag the mouse a little. So having rotate on right click only would be way less annoying, especially when combined with the momentum.
albumen 7 hours ago [-]
But then it wouldn’t work on a touchscreen, and it wouldn’t go viral.
daakni 9 hours ago [-]
Feels very satisfying
BrenBarn 3 hours ago [-]
This is oddly satisfying. Only weird part is it seems to split whichever piece I click, even if it's behind another piece or in between two other pieces, where it would be difficult or impossible to hit just that one piece and not the others around it.
kiriberty 6 hours ago [-]
But why?
Aboutplants 4 hours ago [-]
Because
kubasienki 8 hours ago [-]
Very infuriating, why does it rotate when i want to split it thinner
makach 7 hours ago [-]
I spent too much time on this.
ETH_start 8 hours ago [-]
Quite realistic. Could be more realistic still if you could chop two blocks at once.
stevenalowe 5 days ago [-]
Very cool sim!
KillerRAK 7 hours ago [-]
good exercise!
olalonde 9 hours ago [-]
Honestly I'm more fascinated by the grass around, but I haven't played games in a long time.
The wood barely moves after it's split. If you split it perfectly, the two halves will almost certainly both fall to each side (they're pushed outwards by the axe).
You can't just randomly split it across the grain into slices like you're slicing bread.
I guess mostly: it's not tiring, which sort of sucks when you're doing it for real, but it is satisfying. This doesn't scratch that itch for me, but I guess it's fun in a way, similar to that cleaning simulator thing.
Hit it around the edges, like taking a chord from the edge of a circle, and try to use the top half of the bit to do cutting. Good ax technique depends on accuracy, on top of which you can slowly add strength as your accuracy improves. If there's a crack in the end of a round, you should be able to put the bit of the ax directly into it, which will normally split it wide open without much effort. Different species of wood have different characteristics though, so terms and conditions apply.
Just put it in a old small tire :)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=G_QZIGVYX_4
Neither mine, I have a machine that does it for me. Much safer and efficient.
Remember: this is the worst that splitting firewood will ever be.
The proper term is a shortened form of "hear him, hear him," which was necessary because British Parliament didn't allow clapping or cheering. Instead, if you wanted to show agreement with a speaker's point, you'd shout out that everyone else should "hear" him.
Not to be confused with "hear ye," which evolved from the French "oyez," which is the imperative form of "to listen," which was shouted at a crowd before an important announcement.
Mocking too nerdy gripes on "simulator" accuracy, sharing some real world experience with physical things beyond the screen frames, and on in the same vein.
A breath of fresh air, really, in the prevailing AI smog.
@shapiro500
No shade if so, I think it’s an awesome little toy.
At the very least, he photographed and built models of logs and his own yard.
This would be fairly straightforward vibecode over a day or two.
Definitely not to throw shade at the guy. But yea, there is nothing here that wouldn't be easily vibeable.
How do you know AI was not used in the making of this?
(personally I don't care, the result seems nice to me)
[1] https://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/title.cgi?46184
And some of the cuts it allowed me would hit the ax handle on another part, the shock from that damages the ax handle and is painful on the hands.
And then there's the lifting the stuck block by the axe and hitting it axe side down to finish the split instead of pulling the stuck axe out.
So the simulation handles none of the challenges of splitting wood.
Well executed fun.
The comments are suggesting that someone could go to town adding different kinds of hatchets, mauls, axes, woods, and different swings, and people would eat it up.
I believe the toy is indifferent to your inability to enjoy it.
Ha ha, that's why we like it.
Is it really that difficult? Maybe my memory is vague, but chopping wood in autumn/fall for the winter just took a bunch of time, and wasn't very fun, but wasn't that bad, especially compared to other things like harvesting veggies stuff where you have to be on the ground. I'm not sure how you'd manage to ruin a axe handle before understanding how to do it well-enough, takes a couple of swings at max.
You quickly learn the differences between locust, pine, maple, oak or, god forbid, cherry.
I wonder if there's a name for the psychological phenomenon of people doing some trivial blue-collar-ish task and then dramatizing it to make themselves sound like a grizzled old hand.
It’s not, 12 year olds can do it. Ruining an axe handle is not a requirement. I’m not saying humans are born knowing how to swing an axe, but c’mon.
And it is certainly not "wear out a whole axe handle just to learn to swing" difficult.
Fiberglass handles are now standard on splitting mauls (for this reason). Rotten hearts, or driving wedges. It is easy to miss a swing by an inch or two when fatigued.
Edit: I also broke my first axe handle. The sibling comments here are wild.
When it does, you put it back and hammer some big screws and nails into it, this way it holds some more time.
(I'm talking about the classic, not sure if there's a remake).
"Looks like its coded by someone who has never split firewood. "
As someone with a wood stove, for my first few chops I rotated the log to orient the checking. Then it dawned on me that the simulation likely wasn't that sophisticated, and I came here to meet up with you guys.
That is, it's probably easier for the development professional to code a pretend version of chopping wood, than it is for the professional axeman to chop out a pretend version of a computer.
However I do eagerly await being proven wrong.
I've spent a lot of time splitting with a big maul, but for me it's harder that it looks. I've broken two mauls by striking to far. And even with "soft" wood, I have stacks of green rounds that I couldn't split at all, the maul just bounces off. But I'm glad that you enjoy the process, I'd probably enjoy watching you work.
Next request, the wood could stack itself somehow.
I'm not super quick with a maul, but I can pretty easily keep up with the hydraulic splitter I've used. The hydraulic splitter is nice for the ones that have really gnarly, interlocked grain.
I hated it then but actually now I miss the time I spend with my father and brother.
The only thing I don't miss is rolling a piece of piss elm over to my city living "tough" cousins after two or three pieces of oak and watching the maul just bounce off. Always funny.
But the long term effects on your joints, even if you think you have perfect technique, its better to just get a wood splitter. We can do a whole winters wood in less than a day now, with minimal effort.
People overestimate how dry wood needs to be to burn correctly. Just have some ultra-dry kindling (seasoned for 2+ years) and you won't have any problems.
On the contrary, I know some folks who let all their wood dry too far, and it burned way too hot and ruined their stove (and almost burned their house down).
Seasoned firewood will burn cleaner, longer, and more efficiently.
More water in the wood means less efficient combustion, more smoke and harsher smoke, which may irritate your neighbors downwind, or everyone around on still days.
If you're looking for a meditative exercise try yoga.
Coming from a kendo background, when I had to chop firewood for a few years while living in the countryside, I generally focused on accuracy. The swing is completely different than with a sword, and getting the chop to land at the exact spot (I drew lines with a marker) tens of times in a row was very satisfying, but required a lot of conscious effort to get there. It's not trivial to land a chop at the exact spot you want, and it's also quite hard to ensure the axe travels at its fastest exactly at the moment of impact.
It can be fun, but you need to be into things like that in the first place; plus, having to do it no matter the weather and all the other things you need to do can kill all the joy instantly.
Most open-hearth fireplaces are tremendously inefficient, not only sending most of the heat up the chimney, but drawing in additional cold air in doing so.
A masonry stove with an external air draw should be far more efficient, and burn much more cleanly to boot. The pollution factor from woodstoves is another major consideration, and means wood-burning is limited in many areas.
Also interesting is the shadows of leaves that stay consistent on the scene as the pile grows, but they don't appear on the splitting area itself.
Lots of engine noise too, I guess that's the ambience in this person's back yard! Probably true for lots of us.
You can't win.
I never had to adjust the chunk to get it to sit right, the maul hit exactly where I told it to, and it even stacked itself!
https://www.audubon.org/magazine/birding-its-1899-inside-blo...
- missing your spot by 6” or more and creating a tiny shard that goes flying - the log you’re aiming at falling as you are in your backswing - getting your maul stuck halfway down the split
Normally a wedge is used to split the wood, but it also doubles as a wedge to be wedged underneath just so you can get the log to stand up.
Also, Y sections (ycombinator mode?). 40 hits later and you might have a nice pile of woodchips, very rarely will it actually split in any clean way.
Also how do I simulate my shoulder and lower back hurting?
But the axe could wobble a bit, depending on some combination of chopping skill and how tired your guy is (simulating shoulder pain and lower back pain). Number of hits required depends on character strength and how straight on the hits are.
I’m not sure how the game would track the pieces of various sizes, though. I guess this would just be for firewood (building wood might have to be handled separately) so maybe it would be fine to just calculate the volume of each slice and have it provide fuel based on that…
Otherwise excellent.
I think it would feel better if it modeled the length of the edge, which should disturb the other horizontal slices.
Very impressive.
https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=48523992